So for Yule, I did a pretty big draw.
Generally when I do a draw or rune cast during a ritual it’s usually more of a “You tell me what you want me to know” sort of thing. I’d gotten a couple of solid reads earlier this month that have helped ground me in terms of Yay New Deck, and Okay I Got The Message regarding more physical pursuits.
But my spirituality is a touch shaky.
I’ve never been a strictly devout person. I usually write it off as just not being my cuppa, but I am interested in at least being a little more structured than I currently am. Which is to say, I want to at least do rituals on the 8 High Days without realizing 5 days too late that the week’s past by.
I’m actively working on that – got a calendar and am setting up reminders in my phone. Restocked my supplies and am working on my own little solitary Druid structure that resonates for me.
So while I was curious to simply hear whatever it was the cards had to say, I was also curious about how my spiritual journey is like to proceed this year.
As usual, card by card first, then we’ll deal with connections.
Key: [Location] – [Representation] – [card]: [Card facts]
1 – Significator (represents querent) – 10 of cups: Very Happily Ever After, but we all know nothing really ends. The 10 of cups is more the ease and security of knowing that no matter what tomorrow brings you’re in a good place to face it. You’re not alone, and while you may not be swimming in material wealth, you’ll not want for good friends and good memories.
2 – Covers querent – The Hermit: Friends and family are wonderful and bring us assurance and strength, but sometimes you must just take a step back. Even good advice can be wrong for you specifically during certain times in your life. Only authentic action is acceptable, and we must discover what this means for ourselves – no one else can make the choice of another.
3 – Crosses querent – 6 of coins: The card of the haves and have-nots. This isn’t strictly material wealth, this is a card of something you have in abundance and are able to provide to others. The trick is to provide in such a way as to help as many as possible, without malice, and without harming yourself. Giving is wonderful, but to give to the point of detriment can cause the whole thing to come crashing down.
4 – Foundation of situation – Death: Death is about change. Not just change itself, but embracing that change and moving through it as painlessly as possible. You can’t stop it, you can’t change what’s coming, and what’s coming might hurt in a powerful way. No matter the cost, embrace it and move forward to a more you-ier you. (You-er you? Distilled you? I think you get it.)
5 – Highest aspiration of querent – The Lovers: A card about following your heart – mostly because there’s nothing else to follow BUT your heart. The choice here isn’t logical, you can’t graph it or list out the pros and cons objectively. Both paths may look identical, but one is the *right* one, and the other – is not.
6 – Recent past – 8 of coins: Improvement – having the opportunity to do so and being able to essentially put your nose to the grind stone in order to accomplish it. It can feel tedious and unrewarding at times because progress can be subtle, but there is joy in noticing the small advances as you continue to master the skill or skills.
7 – Recent Future – 6 of cups: A gift of giving without guile or secret intent. Kindness for it’s own sake – with no need to fear deeper meanings or concerns.
8 – Querent’s self image – The Sun: Let the Good Times Roll. While they aren’t meant to last forever, take solace in the good days. Count your blessings, be grateful for the things you ought be grateful for. Tomorrow may be a little darker, but The Sun always comes back.
9 – Querent’s environment – Hanged Man: All actions have happened. All moves have been made and all words have been spoken. There’s nothing left to do but wait. Meditate, pray, relax – calm the parts of yourself that scream to do more, to move more, to say more. You’ve cast your lot as best as you knew how, and now you’ve got to wait for the outcome.
10 -Querent’s hopes and fear – 5 of cups: This card isn’t just about loss. It’s about picking yourself up after a loss and being able to move forward. It’s the actions you take after the deep soul-wrenching cry that makes your face a mess and knots your stomach. It’s the strength left over (the two cups still upright) to move forward after change.
11 – The Outcome – 3 of coins: The Teamwork Card. Everyone’s working together toward a common goal. Not just in school or work, but life. This is the Friendship is Magic card (in my opinion) the reminder that you’re not alone in doing The Thing, and that you can trust your friends/family/coworkers/etc. to be beside you.
I’m okay with the 10 of cups as being “me” in this spread. I’m very overtly positive. Things ARE going to be okay. It WILL all work out. It IS going to be fine – and like Actual Fine, not just “FINE”. Plus the understanding that nothing is ever completely over – from the smaller day to day of usual life all the way to big giant Universal Picture of Life™.
While the Hermit is the card that covers the querent, I think in this case its less something everyone else sees and more something that covers me invisibly. (Or maybe I just think I’m being sneaksy and in reality all my friends and family already know this about me). But the Hermit is very much about weighing all the pieces and parts and being SURE before taking action. I’ve done this to the point of detriment before, a la Executive Disfunction, where I let the weight of weighing things grind me to a halt – a sentiment that crosses well with the 6 of Coins which is, again, a card about considering the pieces and parts before making the Right™ choice.
The foundation of the situation is… DEATH?! Whaaaa—Just kidding! Death’s not a bad card to get. It’s not about death in the strictest end-all sense. It’s about change. Change can be hard and messy and absolutely no fun at all, but it’s nigh unavoidable and – in the case of this card – more often than not results in a better outcome. It can be difficult to see, and it can be the last thing you want to hear someone tell you (“It gets better”, etc.), but this is very much the caterpillar to butterfly card.
The Lovers is a creepily spot on card. Because I *do* want to aspire to be able to follow my heart more often. To be able to make those hard, illogical decisions without being stalled by fear or doubt.
Recent past fits well, as I did really get into my art and manage some solid improvement. In my Japanese lessons as well. Both have fallen a bit by the wayside lately, but everything went off-track (and not necessarily in a bad way) and it has been a trial to get back on the trail.
Recent future sounds nice ^_^ I think we could all use some straight forward kindness in our lives no matter where we are in them.
The self-image card pairs well with the Significator card. 10 of cups meet The Sun \o/ You get a happy hug, and you get a happy hug, and you get a happ- oh, not a hugger, okay, I shall smile happily in your direction then.
Ugh, Hanged Man as the environment card.
I hate waiting.
I _hate_ waiting.
Inaction feels like a waste and when I feel like I’ve wasted time or resources then depression rears its ugly head and I’m dancing around the dark pit of Just Fuck It All™. But apparently my best course of action is to just chill. Forcing something is just worse in the long run – especially when you’re talking about your Spirituality. Or heck, even art, work, friendships, relationships… it’s all fiddley, and it if you push too hard it all just kind of breaks.
…. …. Fine, FINE… I’ll do the waiting thing.
5 of cups as my Hopes and Fears. Loss happens. I learned most definitively over the last few years that loss happens and you can’t stop it. It doesn’t make the fear of it any less, but I certainly hope I can pick myself up afterward and move forward.
Finally, the outcome card. The 3 of Coins – the teamwork card. The Friendship is magic card! \o/ No matter the change, no matter the patience needed, no matter the muck and mire and UGH of waiting, things are going to be awesome. Because *I* have awesome friends and family to support the things I’m going to undertake. I have people On My Side, who are there to support me as I support them. It’s all connection and give ‘n’ get, and this is a very reassuring card.
While I’d like to be able to take my journeys on my own – some weird personal thing about being “strong enough” to do the thing by myself – I’m old enough (and possibly wise enough) to understand that nothing should be weathered or journeyed solo.
Well, I have felt a bit like I needed to just… stop. Just for a little bit. Maybe until the new year. Not like, stop everything, but stop pushing. Just relax, do nothing for a while. Spend more time in my space and just relax and not fret.
I’m, unfortunately, pretty good at pushing myself past what I should. I can do this thing, and that thing, and that thing, and this other thing, and I’m really bad at admitting that I’ve picked up too many things. I don’t like admitting I Can’t Do The Things.
I don’t like “waiting” for results either. My brain goes to bad places.
Your art’s not improving, why are you even bothering?
You’ve been practicing Japanese for a solid 3 months, how’s come you can’t speak it?
You’ve been meditating but you still can’t solidify your space, it’s not going to happen, just stop.
You’ve been doing this work for work for 2 years, you’ve stopped getting better just accept it.
You’re Too Old™, it’s not going to work out.
Your weight went up, might as well stop trying to lose it anymore, it’s not going to work.
If you’re not getting hospitalized for working too hard then you’re not working hard enough!
Augh, bad brain-space is bad, let me tell you. But, that’s part of why I Really, and I mean REALLY like tarot and runes. It’s a mathematical, spiritual, and connective way for the Universe to talk to you (math IS the language of the Universe, after all). All the variables in spread, location meanings, combinations, cards/runes, question, intent, etc. It’s perfect. It’s logical and spiritual and it really brings my brain together. Which really kind of brings my soul some peace.
Gives me something to throw at the weasels when they’re misbehaving as well.